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When Friends Are Not for Forever
Lily Tabanera
Published on

Most of us grew up with the idea that you’ll find a BFF, a long-lost sister, or a solid group of friends, and spend the rest of your lives hanging out with each other. You want your friendships to be like Carrie and Miranda’s, Cher and Dionne’s, or something that resembles the cast of Friends


But friendship “break-ups” do happen. Maybe you drifted apart over the years or you had a huge fight that was left unresolved. Whatever the reason, it happened and now you’re stuck in a rut, rehashing everything that went wrong. But losing friends, just like an ex, can be okay. Here’s why: 
1. It’s completely natural.

It’s normal to grow apart as you get older. It was easy to maintain friendships when you were students because of the proximity. You saw them every week, sometimes every day. But as the years go by, you’ll realize that some friends are seasonal. People come and go, and you just have to accept that. 

2. Some friendships are toxic.

Some people are not healthy to be around with. Maybe you grew up with them, but they’ve changed for the worse. Maybe they have skewed views about human rights or stereotypes. Back when you were “together”, they may have made you do things that you didn’t want to do. In the long run, you’ll see that you’re better off without them. Life is healthier and toxic-free.   

3. Insincerity is old news.

We’re all respectable grown-ups now. You don’t have the time to pretend. You don’t have to be friends with certain people the way you did in high school or college. You want to have honest conversations and focus on relationships that help you grow.

Have you ever gone through a friendship “break-up”? Share your thoughts and tag us on Facebook and Instagram @iamclaireph.